But I Thought You Didn't Want Them
by sjohn2999
Summary: Harry struggles with his most difficult challenge yet... feeding his three-year-old godson.


**A/N: I own none of the characters. Enjoy.**

**But I Thought You Didn't Want Them**

Slouched in his chair, legs partially spread, arms crossed, and eyes narrowed challengingly, Harry Potter faced down his most formidable opponent yet. Lifting an eyebrow questioningly, Harry waited on tenderhooks for a few tense moments before a decisive shake of the head dashed his hopes, causing him to sink further in his chair in disappointment. Closing his eyes and sighing, Harry pinched his eyebrows together in frustration. There had to be a solution to this problem. Rising from his slouched position, he leaned his elbows on his knees, bowed his head, and ran his fingers through his messy hair before raising his eyes to meet those of his current nemesis.

Sitting across from him in a highchair was three-year-old Teddy Lupin.

Swinging his legs innocently, Teddy gave Harry an adorable smile that simply oozed cuteness. While most people would do anything for that smile, Harry knew better than to fall for his tricks. Behind the pearly little teeth and round eyes that changed from blue to green as he watched was a devilishly stubborn and devious child.

Teddy was endearing and he knew it.

At the young age of three he had discovered that he could manipulate anyone just by smiling, giving them a hug, or some other action equally as deceptive. Harry, however, refused to be taken advantage of. He was not weak! He had defeated Voldemort for Merlin's sake! He would not let a three-year-old get the better of him! Andromeda had dropped Teddy off for the weekend, and she was counting on him to make sure Teddy ate properly. Harry Potter was up to the task!

Energized from the pep-talk he mentally gave himself, Harry got up from his chair, picked up Teddy's fork off his plate, speared a carrot, and held out the fork for Teddy to take.

Using a falsely cheerful voice, Harry said, "Hey buddy. You like carrots, right? How about you eat some? Yeah?"

Teddy giggled.

Taking this as a good sign, Harry smiled back. "Open up then," he said.

"No."

Ok. Asking didn't work. Bribery? "Teddy. If you eat your carrots, I'll take you to the park, and we'll go on the swings."

Shaking his head, Teddy stuck out his tongue and blew a raspberry disdainfully.

"I'll give you a cookie?"

Another raspberry.

"I'll buy you a fake spider to torment Uncle Ron with…"

Head shake.

"A real spider?"

"No."

"But you _love_ tormenting Uncle Ron!"

"No."

Sighing, Harry changed tactics. Time to try force feeding.

Shrugging off the questionable ethics of trying to force food into a child's mouth, Harry pinched the boy's nose closed, waiting for him to open his mouth to breathe. Andromeda said Teddy had to be fed; she didn't say how to do so. After about 30 seconds, Harry was rewarded with the slight parting of baby lips. His triumph, however, was short lived. Teddy was breathing through his teeth.

There was no way Harry would be able to pry open Teddy's jaws without sustaining major injuries. It wasn't worth the risk. Defeated, Harry's head fell to his chest dejectedly, glasses sliding halfway down his nose.

Placing his little elbows on the highchair tray in front of him, Teddy propped his head on his hands and continued swinging his feet nonchalantly.

How could a three-year-old get the better of him?

If this were a Harry Potter vs. Teddy Lupin Quidditch game; where goals consisted of food in Teddy's mouth for Harry and food on Harry's face for Teddy; he was losing by 50 points and Teddy was about to catch the snitch. There had to be a way to even the score.

Pushing his glasses higher up on his nose, Harry determinedly resorted to his last option: Begging.

"Will you _please_ eat something, T? For me?"

"No."

"Please?" Harry pleaded, a note of desperation in his voice.

Teddy cocked his head to the side, looking thoughtfully at Harry for a moment, before dashing all hopes again: "No."

"Why not?" Harry inquired exasperatedly, throwing his hands in the air and dropping the carrot filled fork back on the plate.

"Cause you funny."

So the kid loved watching him make a fool out of himself. Well, he was doing quite a good job of it right now.

"Please, Teddy?"

"No."

Harry groaned and let his head drop to the table despondently, and more forcefully than intended. "Ow," he muttered. Teddy giggled.

Lifting his head from the table, Harry rubbed his head ruefully and looked at the smiling boy in front of him. Harry glanced at his watch. They had been at this for the better part of an hour. If Teddy had refused to eat for this long he was not going to give in anytime soon.

Laughing lightly and shaking his head, Harry said, "Ok, T. You win. You don't have to eat the carrots. Just let me clean up here and we'll go play."

Scooting his chair closer to Teddy's plate, Harry picked up the fork, popped the carrot in his mouth, and began chewing. He swallowed and stabbed another, lifting it to his mouth. Just as he was about to eat it, Harry looked up to see Teddy blinking at him confusedly, his little eyebrows furrowed.

Taken aback at the mood change, Harry asked, "Something wrong, buddy?"

Teddy was silent for a moment, then pointed at the carrot on the fork in Harry's hand. "But those mine," he said. The significance of this utterance had yet to reach Harry as he continued to eat another of carrot off Teddy's plate.

As he chewed, Harry watched Teddy's face fall into a pout. Such a face was inconsistent with his earlier actions. Realization dawned in a wave of clarity. He had been played. Teddy was just messing with him, but he could still reign supreme. All was not lost. He swallowed decisively, quickly formulating and putting his new plan into action.

Clearing his throat to prepare himself, Harry opened his mouth in a fake surprised manner and raised his eyebrows, "But I thought you didn't want them."

Teddy reached out his hand toward the fork and opened and closed his hand in a grabbing motion. Harry looked at Teddy, then at the carrot on the fork, then back at Teddy and ate it.

The boy's little eyes widened in a mixture of surprise that he had not gotten his way and concern that Harry would eat all of his food. "Stop!" he cried anxiously.

Feigning ignorance, Harry shrugged skewered a precious carrot, "Stop what?"

"Stop eating my carrots, please!"

"Oh? You want them now?" Harry raised his eyebrows doubtfully. "You didn't want them before. They're mine now."

Teddy shook his head frantically. "Please. I hungry."

In an attempt not to laugh in victory, Harry carefully schooled his features into ones of calm indifference. Not that a three-year-old would have been able to recognize "calm indifference" as the specific expression over any other, but Harry was taking no changes. Teddy was too clever for his own good. If Harry showed his real feelings, the situation could easily revert back to Teddy's favor. Harry could not take that risk.

He pretended that he was thinking it over: "And you'll eat them all?"

His tiny skull nodded so vigorously Harry was almost afraid he would vibrate himself out of his highchair.

"All right," Harry conceded, as though forfeiting ownership of carrots was a huge inconvenience to him, "if that's what you want." He held out the fork handle to Teddy, which he immediately grabbed and began eating with great vigor.

Turning away from his godson and heading to the kitchen sink, Harry allowed himself a triumphant smile. As he filled the sink with soapy water to do the dishes, Harry watched fondly as Teddy shoveled food into his mouth at a pace that made it clear he was worried about a renewed attempt to steal his carrots.

Harry's grin widened. That will teach the kid to never underestimate Harry Potter again… even if he only won by accident. But Teddy didn't have to know that part.

**A/N: I hope you liked it. Please let me know what you think.**


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